Tag Archives: Non-verbals

13. HOW CAN I TRANSPORT THAT?

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Carrying

What objects are carried rather than transported in another way? How are they carried (baskets, plastic bags, in the arms or hands, slung in a cloth, in a suitcase, on the head)?

What are the cultural expectations as to the type of receptacle that a child, a man, a woman, an elderly person might use or not?

  • What kinds of “stuff” would local people expect people to be carrying?
  • What kinds of things are unusual for them to carry?
  • What would be expected of you as a foreigner?

Does the length of time items need to be carried determine the way they are carried?

Get the terms for the different methods of carrying (on the head, by the handle, with a carrying pole, under the arm, slung between two people, etc.).

Other transport

What other methods are used to transport items from one place to another? Are these specific to different geographical areas? different ethnic groups? gender-specific?

How much cooperation is involved in their use?

  • Are these privately owned and used?
  • Can they be borrowed if needed?
  • Are some available for public use?
  • Who owns them?
  • What is the fee charged for their use?

Learn the names of the various contrivances. Are these ones you can use? If so, find out how you can access them.

Are there certain times during the day when particular things are likely to be carried? Is there a peak time when demand is high for transporting of goods?

Listen for the greetings or questions used when people or drivers pass each other on the way or as they enter or leave the village or building. Observe expressions and body language as well.

22. BODY LANGUAGE IN ONE-ON-ONE COMMUNICATION SITUATIONS

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Note how people act when they talk to each other.

  • How far apart do they generally place themselves?
  • When people talk to you, how comfortable are you with the distance they keep?

Note the range of facial features used: raising the eyebrows, frowning, smiling, gesturing, etc.

Note head movements and how assent and dissent is conveyed through these movements.

Note body position and posture during conversations.

  • What position is taken for a relaxed conversation?
  • For a mother scolding her child?
  • For an argument between adults?
  • Are people seated comfortably? on the edge of their seats? leaning forward? looking down, or up, to the person being addressed?
  • What do these convey?

Note various positions of arms or legs during conversations. Do the gestures give an idea of what the conversation is about?

How are the eyes directed: where is the gaze directed while speaking? while listening?

Note differences there may be when:

  • Men are conversing with men
  • Women with women
  • Men and women conversing together
  • A child is addressed.

How does the listener communicate that he/she is listening?

Are there certain motions that convey a message without saying anything (like “come,” “go away,” “that’s enough,” “forgive me,” “thank you”)?

Compare the gestures and distance in informal situations with more formal situations, such as at a town meeting, a church service, or negotiations for a wedding, ceremony, purchase, etc. In public situations does everyone listen attentively or is there a certain amount of “murmuring” allowed?

After noting these, look at your own communication habits and evaluate whether any need to be changed so as to not offend unnecessarily.

53. CONVERSATIONAL NUANCES

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Why are these important? As you progress in the language and interact in different conversational events, noting these points can help you emphasize your point in a cultural way, or help you avoid actions that can give a negative connotation to the local people. Learn to be sensitive to these signals and begin to use them when you enter a conversation

Notice what goes on as two people interact in a conversation. Many verbal and nonverbal signals will be given in addition to the actual content of the conversation.

Note the hesitation pauses (similar to English “uh, um, er”, etc.) and where they occur (before the speaker opens the conversation or before be makes a special point? while the speaker wracks his brain for the “right” word? used by the listener to let the speaker know he’s still listening?).

Note eye contact between speaker and listener. Does the speaker look the listener straight in the eye? When, and during what kind of interaction (in ordinary conversation, or when giving a command, explaining something, or issuing discipline)?

Do they glance away periodically? When? How does the listener indicate that he is paying attention? Where is his gaze?

How far apart do people sit or stand? Do these positions shift at points in the conversation, as perhaps when a change in turns to speak occurs? What does the distance between speaker and listener indicate about the intensity of the conversation? Is this distance different if speaking to a child?

How are head, eyebrow, lip, hand, arm, or leg movements used in the interaction, and what do these signal? Do any of these indicate boredom, interest, disagreement, embarrassment, or any other reaction?

What does voice volume indicate? Does a raised voice always indicate anger?

Notice how people express their emotions. When do people smile, frown, blush, cry, look blank, appear unmoved, giggle, etc.? There will likely be some significant differences between the way they express their emotions and the way you express yours. For instance, how do the local people express anger, grief, bewilderment, embarrassment, displeasure, happiness, love, etc.? Spitting, for example, in some cultures is an indication of anger or disgust. Learn to express your emotions in culturally understandable and acceptable ways.

54. FRIENDSHIP AND ALIENATION

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Who is considered a friend? What are the qualities of a good friend?

Is a person’s status known by the number of friends he/she has?

How are friendships formed within and beyond the immediate community?

Can friendships be formed between different age groups?

Do people have many friends or only a few close friends? Are friendships maintained when people move away? How?

What do friends do together? What expectations are there between friends (emotional support, financial help, care of children, etc.)?

What actions offend people enough to produce hostilities or broken friendships? How do people react to offenses, indications of hostility from others, or false friends? How do they indicate their hostility toward or dislike of another person (silence, avoidance, spitting in the other’s presence, shouting insults at the household dog when the offending person or enemy is nearby, etc.)?

How is reconciliation achieved?